Many bloggers have written many blog posts containing many points regarding the many things authors should not be doing on Twitter if they want to sell their books (there’s a mathematical formula in there somewhere). So, why should I add to it? Well. Because it’s quite obvious that nobody has been bloody listening; that’s why.…
Inappropriate Stock Photo Of The Week: More Unlikely Employees
It’s the Irish Times again, folks. I said last week I thought I might have a problem getting away from this particular publication when it came to candidates for this dubious gong. I wanted to be wrong. I wasn’t. This week’s gem comes from an article which claims to give us guidelines for introducing new…
What If Authors Behaved In Real Life Like They Behaved Online?
Come with me now on a journey to explore a side of the Internet which is still driving me batty. I know you don’t want to be driven batty, but let’s face it, if you wanted peace, or even sense, you wouldn’t be reading this blog in the first place. Picture the scene. You’re at a party. You know nobody there, but you’ve…
Inappropriate Stock Photo Of The Week
Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, to a new segment called “Inappropriate Stock Photo Of The Week”. This highly covetable award is given to any publication whose lazy and ham-handed use of irrelevant, terrible or inappropriate stock photos for illustration purposes deserves both recognition, and a good kick up the arse. This weeks’ award goes to the…
Child’s Play: 5 Ways To De-Stress Adults And Make Tons Of Money
This week’s post is brought to you by the letters “WTF” and the news that 5 out of the current Top Ten Amazon bestsellers are colouring books… for adults. Now, I’ve nothing against colouring books for adults: in fact, I think they’re a bloody marvellous idea. I first heard of them when I came across an…
5 Cheeky Tips For Bloggers Embarking On The A-Z Challenge
April is a month when thousands of bloggers embark on what’s called the The A-Z Challenge: where people blog on 26 near-consecutive days (every day except Sundays) – on a theme of their choice. It’s a fantastic exercise. It can get the blog blood flowing, prodding bloggers either out of a pit, or into a routine; and it’s a sure-fire way…
Dublin Literature Festivals: This Town Ain’t Big Enough For…. Any Of Them
Festivals are fabulous. In Ireland, we have 143 of them every week. Some of them are small, such as the little-known Toenail Clipping Festival, which takes place in a short field in Leitrim on the first Friday of February at 11 o’clock. Some are larger, such as the annual feast of St. Patrick, which has…
Why I’d Be Really Crap At Having An Affair
I’m trying to carry on three fairly intense relationships at the moment. Simultaneously. And it’s no fun, let me tell you. I don’t know how some reprobates can do it with ease. I think it’s way too much pressure, trying to do right by more than 1 loved one at the same time, and still have time to wash…
Tark And Mara Go On Retreat And Find Themselves
Mara swept Billy goat’s-curd serum from her upper lip and sat up. She would know that noise anywhere. The man she loved was in pain. She had to go to him. She wound a bamboo hand-towel around her fleshless frame and donned sunglasses before exiting the treatment room. She was only three minutes into a two-hour Deeply Detoxifying Core Cleansing…
Authors! Your First Chapter Is Killing Your Book
To begin with, let’s make one thing clear: first chapters SUCK. The best first chapters in the world still suck – for writers, that is. The simplistic beauty of killer first lines and blockbuster beginnings, which hook the reader in several different ways, will usually cause their writers to collapse in a puddle of headachey sweat, eyes rolled back,…
Tara Sparling writes 